I ran my first race - and half marathon - of 2019. I didn't train for it the way I should. I also scaled back on my running a lot after starting a new job and recent engagement. It was a hot day, and suffice it to say, I wasn't ready.
I finished the race, but I didn't run the whole time, which is usually my goal. My time was also a lot slower than I wanted it to be. For the first time in almost a decade of running I crossed the finish line and broke down in tears.
I was embarrassed of my time, ashamed that I didn't put the time into training and just flat out exhausted. I wore my medal around my neck and it felt heavy with the guilt and shame I was carrying. But as the day wore on that medal served as a reminder that I should be proud.
I made an effort to get out there and take on a race, even if I wasn't 100% ready. There were people who wanted to sign up for the race and didn't, there are people who aren't able-bodied and couldn't. I crossed the start line and the finish line yesterday and that in an of itself is an accomplishment and a privilege.
I finished the race, but I didn't run the whole time, which is usually my goal. My time was also a lot slower than I wanted it to be. For the first time in almost a decade of running I crossed the finish line and broke down in tears.
I was embarrassed of my time, ashamed that I didn't put the time into training and just flat out exhausted. I wore my medal around my neck and it felt heavy with the guilt and shame I was carrying. But as the day wore on that medal served as a reminder that I should be proud.
I made an effort to get out there and take on a race, even if I wasn't 100% ready. There were people who wanted to sign up for the race and didn't, there are people who aren't able-bodied and couldn't. I crossed the start line and the finish line yesterday and that in an of itself is an accomplishment and a privilege.
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